John Hoffman wrote an article in Today’s Parent (the December 2005 issue) with this title.  I loved his list of seven things, so here they are:

1. Be a responsive, loving caregiver to your baby.  Take care of her basic needs and comfort her when she cries.
2. Build and maintain a strong, secure relationship with her as she grows.
3. Help her develop life skills and give her age-appropriate control over some parts of her life.
4. Help her to succeed, but don’t try to shield her from all disappointments and failures.
5. When she’s frustrated or sad, be there for her and help her learn that it’s normal to feel bad sometimes, but that feeling bad doesn’t last forever.
6. Teach her productive ways to think about the setbacks she will inevitably encounter during her lifetime.
7. Model optimistic behaviour and thinking yourself, but make sure it is tempered with realism.

I think these seven secrets are the kind of thing we as parents should put on our fridge or read over to ourselves every once in a while.  Some of them are easier said than done, but take heart knowing that you’re moving in the right direction!